I read this article today about ugly truths of modern dating, #1 was "the person who cares less has all the power".
Today also officially ended my 3 year relationship. And damn that article hit me. I've always loved like I was taught to love, like I was loved by my family. Openly, whole-heartedly, and without contest. Despite modern times I send snail mail, I make phone calls, and I believe in love. I also didn't hold the power.
Our relationship ended because he didn't know what he wanted. There are a million of options out there and in the end I was just an option. And I'd rather be nothing over an option.
Then this hit my instagram feed.
I'll be heading to Texas. To a state I've only been in twice, both times with a boy I thought I had a future with. I'll be creating a new future without him. I'll be hitting a killer learning curve. I'll probably cry. I may adopt the ugliest mutt dog I can find. But I'm not going to stop being who I am. I'm not going to degrade myself to the level of an option.
Life is difficult. Love is difficult. But I'm still better off hurt, sad, and motivated.